Category Archives: Life thoughts

March 30, 2010 · 5:35 pm

Care

Sometimes I think I care too much, but is that really possible?  I care about the many people in my life: friends, family, students, parent of students, my dog (well he is sort of like a person) and then of course there are the orphans in Haiti, and the women with breast cancer that I will honor in September while walking in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer. I care about people getting all that they deserve from life in the most pleasant manner possible.  I care that they are healthy and that they are able to contribute to world.

If I put the word “take” in front of “care” then it becomes another important message:  take care.  If we are to help others, we must first take care of ourselves.  Or maybe we must also take care of ourselves.  It is the message we get on airplanes about putting the oxygen mask on first so we are able to care for others.  To care about oneself is to realize that what you put into your body becomes your body, what you do with your body impacts your body’s ability to function and that your body is the home for your inner spirit while you reside here.

Care is also something we give as a gift to others.  When my mother was in Hospice, I was amazed by the compassion her caretakers had for her.  They barely knew her, yet they cared for her a gently as they would their own mother.  The tender touch we give a newborn, the comfort we give as we wrap our arms around an injured child, the casual caress we give our partner upon departure, all of these signs of caring are shown through tender, physical touch.
We can also demonstrate caring by taking the first step, calling first, being the first to suggest a get together, the first to send a comment, the first to offer to help, the first to volunteer.  We show we care by giving advice to others that will enable them to enrich their own lives, to improve their health and their future.  We demonstrate caring by cooking a special meal, buying a little treat for no reason, doing something nice “just because.”

We show we care when we relax, decompress our schedule, make time, when we sit on the beach with someone and just listen to the waves and watch the seagulls.  The ability to care is not reserved for humans, animals demonstrate caring and unconditional love, but we can express our caring with words and acts of kindness, and because we can, we must.

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March 29, 2010 · 10:17 pm

17 Words

My New Diet

Over the years I have been fascinated with learning.  I love to learn new things about myself, about the world, and topics relating to improving oneself and striving for a balanced life.  I am also dedicated to improving my health which has been a project for more years than I’d like to remember.  When I was a member of Weight Watchers, our group leader gave us these 17 words, Power Words.  I have mine in a small frame on my bathroom sink when I can see them first thing in the morning.  I select one word to focus on each day, but I thought it would be interesting to focus on one word each day right here in my blog.

The words are:  prepare, care, believe, forgive, change, risk, listen, choose, relax, pray, persist, wait, smile, focus, act, trust and accept.

Today I will start with “prepare.”  This word is especially appropriate for me today because after a relatively easy bone density scan, I received the unhappy news that I have Osteoporosis.  The causes are not known yet but will be revealed after the 7 test tubes of blood are examined.  Osteoporosis can be caused by many things, such as age, low vitamin D levels, low calcium absorbtion, or it can be hereditary.  That is my suspicion since my mother also had Osteoporosis.  So, I actually have it, it is not just a precursor to the condition.  I have to prepare and establish new routines to prevent further degeneration and also build up strength and balance to prevent future injuries.

I have a plan of attack.  I will take my vitamin supplements religiously, resume my yoga practice, walk my one hour daily, and eat lots of dark, green leafy veggies.  I will prepare and strengthen my body to hopefully thwart future degeneration.

Preparation is a life skill that must be taught.  The skill of being able to take a peak into the future and predict what might happen in order to prepare ahead of time is something I hope to teach my own daughters.  I hope to spare them the news I received today by encouraging them to be proactive, establish healthy habits now and to realize that the things you think will happen way off in the future arrive sooner than you thought they would.  After all, I still feel 19 inside and am constantly shocked to find out that I’m not.

Prepare!

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March 25, 2010 · 10:06 pm

Finding Time

Where does the time go?

I am searching for time.  Recently I seem to be dwelling in an abyss of obligations, commitments and sleep deprivation.  Time eludes me and when I do find it, it travels swiftly through the hourglass, reminding me of that old soap opera, The Days of Our Lives.  How can I accomplish what I need to and what I want to?  I am convinced I have to restructure time and set new boundaries for myself.

1.  Limit time on the computer, specifically on social media.  Computers are time suckers.  They seem so efficient and helpful but in reality they are magnets that attract you and then hold you fast.  There is no such thing as “quickly checking your e-mail.”  To attempt to quickly do anything is to enter the labyrinth of the cyber world.  Exiting is a tricky task.

2.  Walk every day.  Walking allows for time to think, plan, wonder, imagine and enjoy the world.  Walking may seem like a time-consuming activity, but the benefits outweigh the time commitment.  The benefit of good health, improved attitude and clarity come along with the obvious benefit of the exercise itself.

3.  Learn to say “no.”  Saying “no” in order to stick to your own plan and your own schedule is different from saying “no” just because you are selfish, or self-involved.   You can help people, and do favors, but just learn to put yourself first and take care of your needs.

Three new rules are enough.  They provide the structure I need and if there were more rules, it would just take too much time anyway.



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March 12, 2010 · 10:03 pm

Pink Slips and Red Faces

I don't think pink is my favorite color anymore.

I can’t help it. The only thing on my mind now is the sad state of affairs at my wonderful little mountain school which is unfortunately ruled by a large insensitive school district and an even larger and cold-hearted State.  The wonderful staff of 16 has been sadly divided into the haves and have-nots.  Those having received pink slips and those who have not.  The pink slips are not pink, and are not slips.  They are cruel white letters notifying my friends and co-workers that they will no longer be employed as of July 1st.  Their classrooms will be vacated and another displaced teacher will move in.  Our school family will be torn apart and all of our work, building community, sharing lives, stories and  commitment to the education of our charges will be forever changed.  These dedicated teachers will move on or move away, their lives forever changed through no fault of their own.  They will possibly change careers, locations, and living situations.  Some will leave to teach in other countries.
Who is to blame for this dismantling?  The same greedy people who caused the collapse of the economy, the tumbling down of the housing market, the elimination of thousands of other jobs and the change of the world economy as we knew it.  People whose thoughts and views do not extend beyond themselves and people with no foresight, compassion or vision for a future that includes prosperity for those outside the circle of  power.
Phrases like “No Child Left Behind” are irrelevant as obviously most children will now be left behind, fall through the cracks and suffer in the silence of class sizes exceeding 30 children.  There will be no winners in the “Race to the Top” because all will wallow at the bottom-teachers, students and parents who dreamed of a better life for their children.  When these parents, elected officials and business people get older, age and depend on the younger generation for medical attention, and care taking, who will be there to do it?  The untrained masses?  Those who have the scars of betrayal left from these decisions to short-change their education?  The red faces of the embarrassed, short-sighted “officials” will not bring satisfaction to those of us affected by today’s actions.
Questions are many and answers are few.  There are, however, the faces of these teachers who are being forced unwillingly out of their classrooms, they are the faces of my friends.

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March 8, 2010 · 10:26 pm

Right to Write

Time to hop back on the treadmill.

Well, so much time has passed and I have very little in the way of an excuse for my lack of writing.  It is true I had the cold from hell for 2 weeks, and yes I was finishing up the last couple of weeks of Six Weeks in a Cast, but it seems that I have been spending a lot of time doing everything but writing.  I have been reading many blogs written by others, finding old and new friends on Facebook, keeping up with my book club reading, attending social events and getting much-needed sleep.  As Gretchen Rubin dictates in The Happiness Project, it is time to Aim Higher.  I take that as a challenge, and being the Type A person that I am, I must have a continuous challenge, meaning there must always be something new to entice me.
I am getting my walking legs back and have joined a couple of women at my school in the Couch to 5k program, starting today. It is actually a great motivator and the best part is that there is an iPhone App. for the program.  Basically you just select the music from your iPod to insert into the program, select the day and week of the program, i.e. today I was on Week 1, Day 1 and the program tells you what to do.  I love it!  It says, “Warm Up.  Brisk walking” and then the timer counts down from 5 minutes.  This continues through walking and running intervals and then a cool-down.  The music plays in between voice commands.  I actually RAN!  That in itself is amazing.  I did my workout, hit a few of the strength training machines and came home to eat my healthy dinner, take my Melaleuca vitamins and drink my water.  Life is good.

The Wellness Company I now represent!

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February 15, 2010 · 10:30 pm

Who are we?

The Path Unknown courtesy of Virgil Poetry

I was wondering today, if we ever really know the people in our lives.  Sometimes we feel like we know each other and that everything is out in the open, but suddenly we are privy to something that opens a door we didn’t know existed.  How do you ever really get to know someone?  The only way to know each other is to be totally honest and open, without fear of repercussions or retaliations.  This is harder than it first appears because while we know what we are thinking and feeling, we cannot predict what others will feel or think.  We have to take chances.  We have to believe that honesty is the best path and that those we love will understand us.  We don’t always know what we are doing, or what the consequences of our actions will be, however, by acting with honesty and with the best intentions, we can be assured that we are on the right path.

There are times when I long for a chance to go back and to re-live parts of my life, like pressing the rewind button on the TV remote control, if only life could be recorded, watched and then revised.  I wish for opportunities to jump into the past and see the reality that existed then, gaining understanding of the actions of my parents and family members.  I want answers that I cannot have, understanding that eludes me and knowledge held at bay.  The mysteries of the past created me, shaped who I am today and impact my life, giving me a shrouded path leading to the unknown.  The choice I have is to give others a clearer picture and light in which to make their choices.

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February 14, 2010 · 6:47 pm

Making a Difference

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I spend my days making a difference in small lives, in small bits, minutes at a time.  I always knew I wanted to do this and I can remember back to 2nd grade, being asked what I wanted to do when I grew up, I never hesitated.  I knew I wanted to teach, to spend my days with children, helping them learn what they would need to succeed.  I have been doing this for 30 years, but  realized 20 years ago, that the youngest children in elementary school were the children I felt at home with and I loved spending my days operating at a dramatic level, performing my teacher act complete with props.  Puppets, alphabet pointers, counters, games, blocks and books, and a healthy dose of make-believe aid me in my endeavor to pass on the foundation of education, the recognition of letters, numbers, symbols.  My students learn life skills, manners, social skills and ABCs.  They learn to count and to count on each other.  They live with me for 6 hours a day and I have the awesome responsibility of giving them all they will need to succeed.  I face obstacles (illness, family trips, doctor and dentist appoints and the threat of a shortened school year) that keep them out of the classroom,  parents overcome with their own lives or mistaken in their belief that “it’s only kindergarten” and it not as important as other grades, a government that does not put education first and a school district consumed with financial worries.

With these obstacles, I still must succeed.  When Davis Guggenheim’s new movie Waiting for Superman arrives, perhaps it will inspire conversation, or will motivate a movement to save public education from elected officials and from itself.  I have hopes, yet daily, I must go to class ready to do my best regardless of these obstacles and needed changes.  I spend my days making a difference in small lives, which will one day grow from the nurturing and education I can give them.


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February 13, 2010 · 9:38 pm

Something In Common

I am watching the opening ceremonies of the Winter Olympics and I notice a stadium full of positive people from all over the world, all getting along and am seemingly exuberant.  How can this be?  Well, these people all in one place with something in common:  the love of athletics. Perhaps if we search for the things we have in common with people of other countries, instead of focusing on our differences, we can create a world that shares joy and comes together during times of sorrow, a tall order for a world of separatists, fierce with pride and often unwilling to see the good in those who are seemingly different.  I propose a one week contest:

For one week, make only positive comments, look for the positive in people and situations and after the week, post a comment here about any changes you notice.

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February 7, 2010 · 10:34 pm

The Sun Came Out

Vroman's Bookstore: A book lovers fantasy.

Today, for the first time in a week, the sun was out when I woke up, providing rays of hope for a day filled with energy and productivity.  This is the first day in the three weeks since “the fall” that I have had enough energy to stay in an upright position for the majority of the day.  I decided to do a bit of belated Happiness Project goals from January in the form of moving energy, i.e. cleaning my cherished writing area of the massive amounts of clutter that have accumulated in three weeks and concurrently, I decided to de-germ our home since we have been under the influence of a nagging cold for the better part of the week.  I carefully listed the areas to be cleaned and I am happy to say I actually made good progress.  I can see the desktop, as well as the surfaces of a few random tables.  Papers have been filed, are waiting to be shredded or are resting comfortably in the trash bin.  I have (gag) paid bills, deleted e-mails and sent communications and now am finally settling in to write my latest thought.

I have decided that I want to be a featured author/speaker at Vroman’s Bookstore in Pasadena.  I have fallen in love with this quaint store that is old (1894), classic in its independence and it’s style:  two-stories, sporting wood shelving and paneling and featuring real booksellers.  Yes, the people who work there are actually booksellers, not retail salespeople and they know of which they speak, their love and knowledge of books permeating the store.  The store features events:  book groups, talks, signings, and readings all listed on its informative website where you can find everything you want to know about this amazing store, past, present and future.

The Pasadena area is a great place for a field trip too, pedestrian friendly with many interesting places to eat.  The community is old and established, the home of the famous Rose Parade and the Rose Bowl its streets lined with mature trees and lovely, stately homes.  Traveling to Vroman’s is like taking a little visit back in time to days when times were simpler, technology was less and books read in their proper form, typeset on paper hardbound with sturdy jackets to protect the binding and flaps of information to entice the reader.

I can visualize myself upstairs in the area reserved for book events, presenting my new book to an enthusiastic crowd who waits patiently to have me sign their newly purchased copy of the book and perhaps pose with me for a picture.  A day when I will sit in the little café in Vroman’s and sigh, “I did it.”

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January 28, 2010 · 9:08 pm

Commiting To Happiness

I made this butterfly cake to celebrate Hope's wonderful journey described in her book The Possibility of Everything.

Last night I spent the evening surrounded by some of my favorite women in the comfortable, serene atmosphere of my friend Sue’s home.  We had delicious potluck (somehow with this group there is always the right combination of food) and conversation followed by a great talk and description of her journey by Hope Edelman.  Her book: The Possibility of Everything is a fascinating story of trust, alternative viewpoints and hope. Hope writes in a most compelling way, and I felt involved in her story on many levels.  First of all, as a mother, I felt compassion for her struggles with her daughter and her commitment to help her daughter come out on the other side.  Secondly, I related to her role as a mother/wife/writer who has temporarily lost her sense of self.  Thirdly, her struggles with her relationship felt all too familiar, balancing time and the energy it takes to support modern lifestyles.  Hope inspired me to write more and to find out what my story will be.

Gretchen Rubin and Me at Vroman's Bookstore in Pasadena

Monday night I had  another literary adventure attending the book signing of Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project at Vroman’s Bookstore in Pasadena.  First of all, as my friend Danielle and I entered the store, audible gasps could be heard from us as we took in the amazing variety of wonderful things, books, cards, gifts and more books.  And, it’s two stories of wonderfulness!  We made our way upstairs in the elevator and enjoyed listening to Gretchen describe her realization of her need to create more happiness in her life. Reading both her blog and her book has motivated me to appreciate more, create what I need and to focus on happiness. We waited for the line to go down and got her signature in our books.  I even managed to have her write a note to my sister-who was unable to attend.  Spreading the happiness.

As we were leaving, we noticed that Friday night, Elizabeth Gilbert of Eat, Pray, Love fame will be talking about and signing her new book, Commitment.  We got two books and two tickets and are looking forward to another night of book talk.

I want to be surrounded and embraced by books, words, new thoughts, random punctuation, other worlds and unforseen experiences.  And through some serendipity, I am.  My next task is to visualize myself as the writer, the creator and eventually the person giving the book talk.  Everything is possible with a commitment to happiness.

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